Temple Predictions – October 2018

Temple-predictions-april-2018
Geoff Openshaw

Geoff Openshaw

Gather 'round the website everyone, for 'tis time to predict the locations of new temples to be announced this General Conference

Rogers Arkansas

Geoff: I don’t even know what else to say here. Rogers or Bentonville has been on nearly every list since we started doing this, hasn’t it, Joe?

Joe: Yes, and why, I have no idea. This is probably the first time I’d elect to put it on our list. It’s been ruining our success averages for going on 5 years now.

Geoff: Well, what the hay, no point stopping now. As you know from the beloved map, northwest Arkansas is one of the only areas of decent population outside of the 200-mile zone in the United States. But beyond that, the Church is actually doing great things there. I find it fascinating that Little Rock is not the center of the Church in Arkansas, but this whole other area near the Oklahoma and Missouri borders.

Argument against: Tornado alley?

Joe: What did Helen Hunt call the F-5 tornado in that super realistic natural disaster thriller, Twister? The Finger of God? Well, that being the case, if Tornado alley is good enough for God’s Finger, then he can light up a temple in those plains as well, Brother of Jared style. Plus, remember when that tornado in downtown Salt Lake lifted its skirt and literally stepped over temple square? Not to tempt fate or anything, but…

Geoff: I do remember that. I also remember the classically Mormon legend that the tornado hopped around, targeting strip clubs. If only it would have hopped farther and taken out NuSkin headquarters.

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